David Hendley on tue 7 oct 97
"Darn!", it was after midnight and that receipt I need to finish
bookkeeping chores for the month was back at the pottery shop. As I opened
the door to the darkened shop I thought I heard something. Kind of a
tinkling and mumbling. I quietly made my way towards the noise, and ended
up in the showroom, next to the mug shelf.
"....and what about Vince? If he gets me I know he'll paint me with Terra
Sigilatta and start rubbing me for hours and hours. Just imagine being
rubbed and rubbed and..."
"Hey, what's going on in here?" I said, as I switched on the light.
All the mugs were gathered around in a circle, with a big blue mug in the
center.
"We're worried about that "Clayart Mug Exchange!", said Big Blue.
"Mug Exchange...", I mumbled, and then remembered that I had grabbed that
mug off the shelf to get a drink a few days ago, and carried it back to the
house to read my e-mail. It set there by the computer for several days
before I took it back to the shop.
"Yeah, it sounds like a BAD IDEA to us," said Big Blue, as I realized he
had been sitting by the computer screen for 3 days reading my e-mail! And
now he was telling ALL the mugs about what he'd learned!
"Just imagine if the Clennells take me home," said a little brown guy.
"Tony will spray me with ITC and make me part of his bag wall!"
"Yeah, or Linda Blossom!" chimed in another, "She puts it on everything."
"What if I have to go to Minnesota with Mel, or South Dakota with Cindy?
They seem like nice people, but I'll FREEZE to death! Two thousand degrees
I can take, but 20 below zero? They might forget about me and leave me out
all night and..."
"Don't worry guys," I said, "these are all people who LOVE pottery. They
wouldn't do anything bad to you. Besides, you might go home with someone
like Dannon. She's nice and you wouldn't even leave Texas. Or Don Jones. I
bet he'd get you your own little plexiglas pedestal to stand on. Just
think of it as a great adventure, something..."
I was interruped by Big Blue, "W-w-what about R-r-r-ron R-r-r-oy?"
The room fell silent. I didn't know what to say. Finally, a demi-tasse on
the top shelf asked, "What's a ron roy?"
Big Blue, trembling, burst out, "He's the most notorious mug abuser on the
North American continent! He has been torturing mugs for years! First he
freezes you, then he boils you. He scratches you with jagged rocks, and
pours acid on you. It's a slow, agonizing death! And he'll be there!"
There were gasps all around the room. How could I explain this?
"Well," I started, "Ron Roy really loves pottery, and he just wants to
help make..."
"No! No! No!", shouted the whole group.
"Calm down, you all," I said, "you've got nothing to worry about."
"Nothing to worry about?", asked Big Blue. "Did you hear what I just said?"
"Remember when we adjusted your glaze to keep it from crazing?", I asked,
"Ron Roy helped us do that. And we increased the flux in the clay to stop
cristobolite development. We checked your flux/alumina/silica ratio, and
recalculated the glaze to eliminate barium carbonate. You all have nothing
to worry about. (cue patriotic music) Like athletes training for the
Olympics, you are ready for any test a mug can be put through. It would be
an honor to be tested. Making things better for all mug-kind!"
Things were calming down.
"It's late," I said, "I'm turning off the light."
"Say 'Hi' to Mel," shouted Big Blue as I was leaving.
"I guess I won't get that bookkeeping finished tonight," I thought, as I
walked back to the house and got ready for bed.
G'night everyone. Sweet dreams.
David Hendley
Maydelle, Texas
See David Hendley's Pottery Page at
http://www.sosis.com/hendley/david/
Ron Roy on wed 8 oct 97
Dear David and all - what can I say - all these years trying to get a
reputation as a good potter and this is how it turns out - something has
gone terribly wrong.
I do have a correction - I scratch em with spoons - not rocks - In the next
dream explain to them - I am not quite as bad as big blue makes me out to
be.
> Big Blue, trembling, burst out, "He's the most notorious mug
>abuser on the
>North American continent! He has been torturing mugs for years! First he
>freezes you, then he boils you. He scratches you with jagged rocks, and
>pours acid on you. It's a slow, agonizing death! And he'll be there!"
Ron Roy
93 Pegasus Trail
Scarborough,Canada
M1G 3N8
Evenings, call 416 439 2621
Fax, 416 438 7849
Studio: 416-752-7862.
Email ronroy@astral.magic.ca
Home page http://digitalfire.com/education/people/ronroy.htm
Liz Willoughby on fri 10 oct 97
>----------------------------
>the top shelf asked, "What's a ron roy?"
> Big Blue, trembling, burst out, "He's the most notorious mug
>abuser on the
>North American continent! He has been torturing mugs for years! First he
>freezes you, then he boils you. He scratches you with jagged rocks, and
>pours acid on you. It's a slow, agonizing death! And he'll be there!"
> There were gasps all around the room. How could I explain this?
> "Well," I started, "Ron Roy really loves pottery, and he just wants to
>help make..."
> "No! No! No!", shouted the whole group.
> "Calm down, you all," I said, "you've got nothing to worry about."
> "Nothing to worry about?", asked Big Blue. "Did you hear what I
>just said?"
> G'night everyone. Sweet dreams.
>
>David Hendley
>Maydelle, Texas
>See David Hendley's Pottery Page at
>http://www.sosis.com/hendley/david/
If Big Blue knew how Ron Roy felt about the colour BLUE he would run like a
bat out of hell.
What a group.
Happy Canadian Thanksgiving. Meticulously loose Liz
Liz Willoughby
R.R. 1
Grafton, Ontario, Canada
K0K 2G0
e-mail lizwill@cyberion.ca
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