Tony Ferguson on sat 7 dec 02
Cher,
I have say after I read your post I nearly cried. I think you put into
context, at least for me, the passionate reminder of why I create--because
its my special thing, it me, my expression of my evolving state of being,
what I was, evolving toward, and currently about. One's work is perhaps the
greatest teacher.
We are sitting with $90 in the bank at the moment and for the first time I
have seriously contemplated doing commercial art in addition to my work.
Will I, maybe, if it gets bad enough. I guess its a question of what one
defines as suffering through your passion and what my family is willing to
accept as our standard of living. I was blessed with a mutually frugal and
conservative wife. Our children will learn resourcefulness and
interdependence and that happiness does not lie in objects, prestige,
monetary wealth or even validation or acceptance by your colleagues. Funny
how the soul-less stuff sells as they are the vaugess reminders of such
potential. What is sad is we accept this commercialism as if we didn't have
a choice--perhaps only the truth seeking are the ones who suffer the most.
Its also funny how when you think or call yourself an artist people try to
tear you down. Like you, I created from the get go. Many many children
live creatively until Adults squash them with their failings. The few that
are recognized always come from struggle and change. Most are never
recognized by the masses. It finally dawned on me that most people aren't
interested in real art because they can't recognize it as many don't know
what it means to be real with themselves let alone attempting to live a
meaningful and realized life. How can you recognize the truth in
someone's work when you can't be truthful with yourself? Most people don't
want to live a self-defined and realized life--they want a fabricated life
where everything fits nicely into place. It is good that you will not
assume the shape of the mold.
I say to you that to continue to walk your own path, a path that aims at
self awareness and honesty, truthfulness in not only expression of your art,
but the expression of your art as the art of life, is beautiful. Change is
always good because it is truly the only thing you can depend on--and you
are riding this wave because your honesty recognizes that it is better to
flow than to oppose at this time in your life--this will always redefine you
as you are never the same river twice. My mother always said be true to
yourself. She never told me how hard it would be.
Artists are born and realized. True artistry is lived in every aspect of
your life. Its not just about making the best art you can, but rather
approaching your life as a creative process--moving with the ebb and flow,
recognizing the paths you have to go down regardless of consequences. It is
good that you listen to yourself--many don't. To thy own self be true too.
I wish you well.
Tony
Thank you.
Tony Ferguson
On Lake Superior, where the sky meets the Lake
Stoneware, Porcelain, Raku
www.aquariusartgallery.com
218-727-6339
315 N. Lake Ave
Apt 312
Duluth, MN 55806
Hank Murrow on sat 7 dec 02
On Saturday, December 7, 2002, at 07:33 PM, Cher Gauvin wrote in part:
> I will not spend one more day doing something that I absolutely
> detest. Since I am forced to start a new life, it will be my way and I
> will
> figure out a way to make it happen, with or without his damn
> rehabilitative
> alimony. And if I fail, I only have to answer to myself. If I get
> really
> hungry, I wonder how crow is going to taste?
> Life is too short and none of us comes with a 100 year
> guarantee.
> Today is the anniversary of my Dad's death. He was 64. He was going
> to
> enjoy his life and do what he wanted after he turned 65. Lost a
> brother at
> 28...he didn't even get the chance to formulate his dreams. All we
> have is
> today. I intend to enjoy it doing what I love.
> Cher
>
Dear Cher;
Here is what Mirabai (trans. by Bly) had to say about it when her
brothers (ashamed of her ecstatic behavior) came to bring her home on a
donkey.
Why Mira Can't Go Back To Her Old House
"The colors of the Dark One have penetrated Mira's body;
other colors washed out.
Making love with Krishna and eating little___those are my
pearls and carnelians.
Chanting-beads and the forehead streak___those are my
bracelets.
That's enough feminine wiles for me. My teacher taught me this.
Approve me or disapprove me; I praise the Mountain Energy
night and day.
I take the path that ecstatic human beings have taken for
centuries.
I don't steal money, nor hit anyone; what will you charge me with?
I have felt the swaying of the elephant's shoulders........
and now you want me to climb on a jackass? Try to be serious!"
I wish Cher elephant shoulders and Godspeed.
Cheers, Hank in Eugene
Cher Gauvin on sat 7 dec 02
Let me say first...Rush, I'm not a drinkin' woman these days (I had my
wild years but the hangovers hurt too much) but tonight I'm pouring myself a
big glass of Crown on the rocks...a toast to you!
Let that also be a warning to the rest of the list and feel free to
hit the delete button at any time. This has gotten intensely personal, so
hell, mel, you might delete it before anyone else sees it anyway. But it
will help me feel better if I write it, whether anyone reads it or not.
I want to talk about the path of an artist. First, I agree with
Rush...artists are born, not created. I was born an artist. I have always
created art from the time I was small, in any available medium. When my
little girlfriends and I would play dress-up brides (no social conditioning
there), they would be happy with a white sheet wrapped around them. Not I, n
o, not for a minute. Got my ass whipped once for taking down Grandma's lace
curtains, stealing all the lace doilies, raiding her jewelry box, cutting off
a prize rose from my grandfather's bush, just so I could create a "real"
bride's dress. At 4 years old, that was art.
When my kids were young, did we have round pancakes? No-o-o, food was
my medium. I made separate face parts...eyes, noses, silly smiles, and
decorated their plates. Presentation was everything. Every recipe I've ever
tried was approached as a blank canvas...I have to tweak it or add my own
creative touch to it. The kids put a sign over my stove that read
"Scientific Experiment". It stayed there for years. One of the family jokes
is about my eldest son begging me "Ma, can't we have just plain vanilla ice
cream just once?" Cooking...that was an art.
I was a homebirth midwife for almost 20 years. Midwifery is an art.
After the initial didactic training, then you learn the art of being a
midwife, using your heart and hands, same as with any art. The pay was lousy
(once a bag of apples), no benefits, the hours sucked, but I loved it and
managed to "support my midwife habit" by tending bar and waitressing part
time, all the while, supporting my two kids with no child support or other
assistance. I made it because I HAD to feed my kids and do my art as well.
But trust me, it was a "real job" with more stresses and responsibility than
any of you could ever imagine. You think a glaze firing failure is
heartbreaking? Try a dead baby.
Then I married my soon-to-be-ex. I didn't realize that we would be
moving every couple of years to a new state every time he got the bug up his
ass (5 relocations in 15 years). Most of the states we moved to after we
left Florida did not have legalized midwifery (apprenticeship trained, as I
was). So that love was taken away from me. The license requirements have
since changed in Florida so I can't go back to midwifery without moving to
another part of the state that has midwifery schools. I have a terminally
ill mother here, so out of the question. And I'm too damn old to do the long
erratic hours...three day stretches with no sleep.
I then went to R.N school, thinking that working OB in a hospital
would be the same. HEHEHE HOHOHO That kind of birthin' babies isn't even on
the same planet as home birth. Two months into nursing school, I HATED it,
but felt that I had to finish what I started and I would learn to tolerate if
not like it. Went to work in an off-site birthing center as an RN, thinking
that it would be close to what I loved to do. Guess what? The pay was lousy
($8.00 hr), no benefits, the hours sucked, I worked 5 times as hard, cleaning
up after the CERTIFIED nurse midwives, and I still hated it. I spent most of
my time charting and cleaning...no art there. Had to follow every protocol
to the T...cover your ass medicine, same as in the hospital. Don't even
think about being creative. I've never worked a day as an RN in anything
other than off-site OB, so hospitals and home health care won't touch me.
Dr. offices are not usually staffed by RNs down here, unless it's a
specialty. The OG/GYN offices employ only (here it comes again,
Rush...)CERTIFIED nurse midwives. Almost 20 years of empirical experience
counts up to nothing in the medical world.
So, to all of your kind and some not so kind suggestions...no, I will
not go back to nursing or flip burgers. To thy own self be true. I must be
an artist, starving if need be. And clay is the medium that sings to me. I
won't give it up and I won't put it on the second shelf. I know that I'm
just having one big hissy fit about all this. I'll have to supplement my
income somehow, but it will be through some artistic endeavor. I can do a
lot of other crafts. I make gift baskets and they sell very well. Had a
bunch of orders for this Christmas that I now can't fill...but Valentine's
Day is coming. I faux finish old flea market furniture. I scrounge garage
sales for deals, then clean it, fix it, and have a couple of huge garage
sales a year...brought in $2800.00 on one sale and always make at least
$1000. I can teach beginning classes to a few high school students. I raise
birds, just finches now, but they put out enough clutches to sell and make a
few bucks. I used to breed some damn fine Basset Hounds...midwoofery, I
called it. Made some extra money there. I have one pretty Golden Retriever,
breeding age now. And I'll admit it...I do polymer clay sculpture (I can
hear the boo-hiss). So there is a lot I can do to support myself. I am
creative. But I will not spend one more day doing something that I absolutely
detest. Since I am forced to start a new life, it will be my way and I will
figure out a way to make it happen, with or without his damn rehabilitative
alimony. And if I fail, I only have to answer to myself. If I get really
hungry, I wonder how crow is going to taste?
Life is too short and none of us comes with a 100 year guarantee.
Today is the anniversary of my Dad's death. He was 64. He was going to
enjoy his life and do what he wanted after he turned 65. Lost a brother at
28...he didn't even get the chance to formulate his dreams. All we have is
today. I intend to enjoy it doing what I love.
Cher
Bob Pulley on mon 9 dec 02
Tony,
I appreciated your words. Looked up your gallery, beautiful work.
Duluth is a beautiful city.
Ever know Sandy Spiker? an old friend who used to live there.
Bob
>>> fergy@CPINTERNET.COM 12/08/02 02:50AM >>>
Cher,
I have say after I read your post I nearly cried. I think you put
into
context, at least for me, the passionate reminder of why I
create--because
its my special thing, it me, my expression of my evolving state of
being,
what I was, evolving toward, and currently about. One's work is
perhaps the
greatest teacher.
We are sitting with $90 in the bank at the moment and for the first
time I
have seriously contemplated doing commercial art in addition to my
work.
Will I, maybe, if it gets bad enough. I guess its a question of what
one
defines as suffering through your passion and what my family is willing
to
accept as our standard of living. I was blessed with a mutually frugal
and
conservative wife. Our children will learn resourcefulness and
interdependence and that happiness does not lie in objects, prestige,
monetary wealth or even validation or acceptance by your colleagues.
Funny
how the soul-less stuff sells as they are the vaugess reminders of
such
potential. What is sad is we accept this commercialism as if we didn't
have
a choice--perhaps only the truth seeking are the ones who suffer the
most.
Its also funny how when you think or call yourself an artist people try
to
tear you down. Like you, I created from the get go. Many many
children
live creatively until Adults squash them with their failings. The few
that
are recognized always come from struggle and change. Most are never
recognized by the masses. It finally dawned on me that most people
aren't
interested in real art because they can't recognize it as many don't
know
what it means to be real with themselves let alone attempting to live
a
meaningful and realized life. How can you recognize the truth in
someone's work when you can't be truthful with yourself? Most people
don't
want to live a self-defined and realized life--they want a fabricated
life
where everything fits nicely into place. It is good that you will not
assume the shape of the mold.
I say to you that to continue to walk your own path, a path that aims
at
self awareness and honesty, truthfulness in not only expression of your
art,
but the expression of your art as the art of life, is beautiful.
Change is
always good because it is truly the only thing you can depend on--and
you
are riding this wave because your honesty recognizes that it is better
to
flow than to oppose at this time in your life--this will always
redefine you
as you are never the same river twice. My mother always said be true
to
yourself. She never told me how hard it would be.
Artists are born and realized. True artistry is lived in every aspect
of
your life. Its not just about making the best art you can, but rather
approaching your life as a creative process--moving with the ebb and
flow,
recognizing the paths you have to go down regardless of consequences.
It is
good that you listen to yourself--many don't. To thy own self be true
too.
I wish you well.
Tony
Thank you.
Tony Ferguson
On Lake Superior, where the sky meets the Lake
Stoneware, Porcelain, Raku
www.aquariusartgallery.com
218-727-6339
315 N. Lake Ave
Apt 312
Duluth, MN 55806
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