Harrington on mon 27 jan 03
I know most of you out there work primarily in ceramics, but we are all
artists, so maybe some can relate to my quandry. I work mostly
figuratively with the intention of casting rather than firing, though
sometimes I fire too. After a break of many years I've finally started
sculpting again, and I'm going gang-busters. Only now, after a lot of
therapy, I've decided I might try to actually express myself in art
rather than just copying nature. My work is still very much based on the
model, but I'm using poses that mean something to me beyond what the
model looks like. In other words, the work is now much more personal.
Well, I just got my first really personal sculpture back from the
foundry, and they did a great job. The only thing is, now I almost hate
the sight of the thing! When I was working on it, and when I last saw it
in clay, I was really happy with it. Now, I look at it and it no longer
has any meaning for me. I don't relate to it any more. If I saw it in a
gallery I would pass it by, or maybe even be put off by it. Also, I've
become very critical of the execution, not just the theme. I almost want
to erase my signature. Other people have reacted positively to it,
especially my psychiatrist who thinks I'm doing something very healing.
How will I ever have a show and be proud to drink cheap white wine at my
opening if I don't even want to own up to my work? (this is not the
first time I've wanted to repudiate what I once thought was good art).
Does anybody else feel this way? Is it normal? It makes me think of
having food poisoning as a metaphor. You want more than anything to get
that bad stuff out of you, and you go through agony to do it, but when
it comes out it's the last thing on earth you ever want to see again!
Lisa
John Rodgers on mon 27 jan 03
Harrington wrote:
> You want more than anything to get
>that bad stuff out of you, and you go through agony to do it, but when
>it comes out it's the last thing on earth you ever want to see again!
>
>Lisa
>
>
Not to over simplify matters, but it sounds to me as if you have done
exactly what you wanted and needed to do ....... get the bad stuff out.
Your piece is a representation of "the bad stuff" and now it is out of
you and into a visible form you see the ugliness of it and want to move
on and leave it behind and never see or be troubled by it again. Sounds
perfectly normal to me.
Before the foundry, you may consider a series, all in clay, and in that
series you may find a point of transition where you find "the bad stuff"
has been transmuted into "the good stuff". The pieces near the end more
beautiful than the pieces in the beginning ..... a visual representation
of a journey from the dark to the light, of where you have been and
where you are when you are done.
Best of success,
John Rodgers
Birmingham. AL
>
>
Bobbruch1@AOL.COM on tue 28 jan 03
Subject: Re: Is it just me? (hating my work)
> You want more than anything to get that bad stuff out of you, and you go
through agony to do it, but when it comes out it's the last thing on earth
you ever want to see again! > >Lisa
You might want to consider calling the new work "transitional work" and
taking the negative of "that bad stuff" out of your vocabulary. It is after
all, transitional work, work that is taking you from one place to another. It
is the process that most of us have to go through to get to that new place.
Bob Bruch
Dave Gayman on tue 28 jan 03
The emotion you can take out of a piece is a fraction of the emotion put
into it. Part of our work is the process, and only the artist really
experiences the process... jeez, how this brings back my early days, when
Happenings were part of the art world...
But the process and its feelings are evanescent, fleeting, gone soon after
you've put the tools down. If it's a loss when that goes away, and it is,
at least you had the experience to begin with.
But maybe there's another dimension, post-partum blues. The most dangerous
moments for an artist's work is the first few weeks, when, after the
moments of creation, the fault-finding and the disillusion comes rolling in
like fog.
As J.T. Abernathy once told me -- I had been whining about how my latest
stuff always seemed crummy to me -- "Sell it. Then you don't have to look
at it." I ran across a box of my goods unsold at my last art fair (1981)
-- my wife and I keep everything -- and I was pleased with the depth of
glazes and the sureness of the hand that made them. I sure didn't have
that attitude in 1981.
Dave G.
At 04:10 PM 1/27/2003 -0800, Lisa wrote:
> I've decided I might try to actually express myself in art
>rather than just copying nature.... In other words, the work is now much
>more personal.
>
>[My first job since the change:] When I was working on it, and when I last
>saw it
>in clay, I was really happy with it. Now, I look at it and it no longer
>has any meaning for me. I don't relate to it any more.
Stephani Stephenson on tue 28 jan 03
Lisa
I think it is natural you are having a strong reaction to your work.
After all , this is the first step , not the culmination, of a new
direction. Even though you are an experienced sculptor it sounds like
you have now opted to include more of a personal approach. This is a new
muscle you are flexing, or an old not-used muscle you are now calling
back into play, a new step in the dance, ... so , maybe the first
attempt ' quacks ' a bit .. you will just need to limber up and
strengthen too.... It is very difficult to change from working from
models to doing more intuitive work , and I would expect that you will
need to play around with the balance, developing you vocabulary , your
voice, stretching, pulling back, going too far, or not far enough.
A strong negative reaction on the part of the maker is a complex thing.
Hate , like love : a composite of many emotions and reactions.
the clash of the intellect, the heart, the ego, the craftsman, the one
who seeks to express.
I wonder , rather than the word hate, if you are feeling 'repelled'
rather than 'attracted' to this work. What is it that repels you? What
was it that attracted you? This is territory you haven't seen in awhile,
and you have built up hopes around your reentry.
Because it is more 'personal' it is going to 'feel' more personal, and
the dispassionate aesthetic critic , the accomplished sculptor inside
you will have difficulty keeping order in the court, calling the
shots.
Maybe your new clay child has come back an unruly bronze, alien,
adolescent .
Not only is it wearing a different skin but perhaps your 'personal '
touches stand out now as imperfect , gauche, naive, weakly developed or
overstated. perhaps they seem cliché, contrived , goofy , sentimental,
exposing things you aren't sure you want to expose, not representing
your best 'face' forward.... just think of how many unflattering words
come to mind, and so quickly , so easily!!!! And there they stand ,
those warts, those words, immortalized in bronze, for everyone to see
and judge!
If you wonder are you alone? you surely are not!
Glean what is valuable and instructive from your reaction. Use it to
learn and grow.
then cut the cord , even if for a week or four, and let the piece stand
apart from you.
New or different work is like some weird new animal in the studio. I
will set a new and different piece in different locations... almost
like I am afraid to look at it full on in the face at first . Instead
I steal furtive peeks at it from different viewpoints. Act like i am a
stranger , a casual passer by. Work that has the strongest immediate
reaction actually takes awhile to .. get acquainted, even though I
spent untold hours making it . You would think we would know each
other well enough, but , no , I have to get to know it all over again
It's eventual place ,in the pantheon or the peanut gallery..... may not
be readily apparent.....
I have made work which I loved out the outset, and came to thoroughly
dislike later on. Also the reverse has happened.
The difficulty is when you think about 'showing' the work you often
find yourself becoming the critic, not the maker of the work..
Our critical thinking is a useful tool It allows us to discern what
is of good quality. We use this thinking thousands of times in making
aesthetic decisions during the making of the work, the showing of the
work In the best flow of working this type of thinking works in
concert with the intuitive part of the process , but it can dominate
and ruin the day if it runs amok.
In the long run, once a piece is made it is your decision what role it
will play, how you will show it or not.
Your own goals are a factor.. whether they have to do with process, or
whether you intend to show or sell the work....
But it isn't always so predictable. I have had my least favorite pieces
sell immediately, to ecstatic customers, while my favorite pieces
languished in a gallery and were returned. (When I say 'least favorite
pieces' it doesn't mean they were of inferior quality,.)..So in some
cases I say, "get it out there anyway.".. other cases I say "that
really should hit the shard pile"!!!!
it is a very personal issue, just don't get jammed up by it...
I am rarely entirely and completely happy with the end results . I
always see things that could have been better. A big impetus for
creating new work is a certain level of dissatisfaction which is really
a quest for improvement, development and exploration.
This is what make me happy in my work. It isn't always ' la la la la la
' easy ,lazy happy but it is challenging warrior princess happy! and
we mere mortals, like warrior princesses , have our ups and downs , our
backtracking, climbing and our slow plodding ways with it. But ain't
it grand.
in time you'll look back at that piece and either say 'what was I
thinking?" or," you know that piece was actually pretty good", or
'that was the beginning of something good" , or " that was the
beginning of something else!"
most of us, (well Ok I will speak for myself anyway), leave a trail of
turds as well as jewels along the way !
Some of those turds even cost more than the jewels!!!!
Stephani Stephenson
steph@alchemiestudio.com
Carlsbad CA
Snail Scott on tue 28 jan 03
At 04:10 PM 1/27/03 -0800, you wrote:
>Well, I just got my first really personal sculpture back from the
>foundry, and they did a great job. The only thing is, now I almost hate
>the sight of the thing! When I was working on it, and when I last saw it
>in clay, I was really happy with it. Now, I look at it and it no longer
>has any meaning for me. I don't relate to it any more...
Give it time. I feel like this every time I make
something, either fired clay or bronze (and I
do all my own casting, too). I always go through
a phase, lasting from weeks to months, where I
think it sucks/looks dumb/trite/lame/inept/etc.
I've (mostly) learned to trust the impulse that
led me to make it in the first place, and give
it time to 'come back' to me.
You don't have to show it right away, but I find
that other people's responses can be a good
'reality check', even if I can't bring myself to
agree with them.
-Snail
| |
|
