Biggins, Chris on wed 28 may 03
What a wonderful profession! Thanks for the message. Chris
> ----------
> From: Lee Burningham (Box Elder High School)
> Reply To: Clayart
> Sent: Friday, May 23, 2003 2:47 PM
> To: CLAYART@LSV.CERAMICS.ORG
> Subject: FW: TEACHER JOB DESCRIPTION/humorous
>
> Howdy,
>
>
>
> Just a little teacher humor at the end of the year.
>
>
>
> Lee Burningham
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> TEACHER JOB DESCRIPTION!
>
> Perspective : Teaching
>
> After being interviewed by the school administration, the eager teaching
>
>
> prospect said"Let me see if I've got this right. You want me to go into
> that
>
> room with all those kids, and fill their every waking moment with a love
> for
>
> learning.
>
> And I'm supposed to instill a sense of pride in their ethnicity, modify
>
> their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse and even
> censor
>
> their t-shirt messages and dress habits.
>
> You want me to wage a war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases,
> check
>
> their backpacks for weapons of mass destruction, and raise their self
>
> esteem.
>
> You want me to teach them patriotism, good citizenship, sportsmanship,
> and
>
> fair play, how to register to vote, how to balance a checkbook, and how
> to
>
> apply for a job.
>
> I am to check their heads for lice, maintain a safe environment,
> recognize
>
> signs of antisocial behavior, offer advice, write letters of
> recommendation
>
> for student employment and scholarships, encourage respect for the
> cultural
>
> diversity of others, and oh, make sure that I give the girls in my class
>
>
> fifty percent of my attention.
>
> My contract requires me to work on my own time after school, evenings
> and
>
> weekends grading papers.
>
> Also, I must spend my summer vacation at my own expense working toward
>
> advance certification and a Masters degree.
>
> And on my own time you want me to attend committee and faculty meetings,
> PTA
>
> meetings, and participate in staff development training.
>
> I am to be a paragon of virtue, larger than life, such that my very
> presence
>
> will awe my students into being obedient and respectful of authority.
> And I
>
> am to pledge allegiance to family values and this current
> administration.
>
> You want me to incorporate technology into the learning experience,
> monitor
>
> web sites, and relate personally with each student. That includes
> deciding
>
> who might be potentially dangerous and/or liable to commit a crime in
>
> school.
>
> I am to make sure all students pass the mandatory state exams, even
> those
>
> who don't come to school regularly or complete any of their assignments.
>
>
> Plus, I am to make sure that all of the students with handicaps get an
> equal
>
> education regardless of the extent of their mental or physical handicap.
>
>
> And I am to communicate regularly with the parents by letter, telephone,
>
>
> newsletter and report card.
>
> All of this I am to do with just a piece of chalk, a computer, a few
> books,
>
> a bulletin board, a big smile AND on a starting salary that qualifies my
>
>
> family for food stamps!
>
> You want me to do all of this and yet you expect me NOT TO PRAY?"
>
>
>
>
> _____
>
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