Edouard Bastarache Inc. on sun 22 jan 06
Subject: Questions about Canada=20
Now that Vancouver is to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some=20
questions people the world over are asking! Believe it or not these=20
questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website. =
Obviously the answers are jokes, and the questions are hilarious; but=20
sadly the questions were really asked. (really sad. )=20
Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants =
grow?UK)=20
A:We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch=20
them die.
Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)=20
A:Depends on how much you've been drinking.=20
Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad=20
tracks? (Sweden)=20
A:Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.=20
Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)=20
A:So it's true what they say about Swedes.=20
Q:It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to=20
contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)=20
A:Let's not touch this one.=20
Q:Are there any ATM's(cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list =
of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)=20
A:What did your last slave die of?=20
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)=20
A:A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.=20
Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the =
hippo=20
racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.=20
Q:Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)=20
A:Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and =
we ll send the rest of the directions.=20
Q:Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)=20
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do.=20
Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)=20
A:Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which=20
is...oh=20
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in=20
Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.=20
Q:Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)=20
A:No, WE don't stink.=20
Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you =
sell it in Canada?(USA)=20
A:Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.=20
Q:Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female=20
population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)=20
A:Yes, gay nightclubs.=20
Q:Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)=20
A:Only at Thanksgiving.=20
Q:Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year =
round?=20
(Germany)=20
A:No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegans. Milk is illegal.=20
Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its=20
name.=20
It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)=20
A:It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the =
brains=20
of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying =
yourself with human urine before you go out walking.=20
Q:Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)=20
A:Yes, but you will have to learn it first.=20
Send this on to other true Canadians
"Ils sont fous ces quebecois"
"They are insane these quebekers"
"Est=E1n locos estos quebequeses"
Edouard Bastarache
Irreductible Quebecois
Indomitable Quebeker
Sorel-Tracy
Quebec
edouardb@sorel-tracy.qc.ca
www.sorel-tracy.qc.ca/~edouardb/Welcome.html
http://retrodemonstration.blogspot.com/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/potier/
http://stainlessfre.blogspot.com/
http://perso.wanadoo.fr/smart2000/index.htm
Farfl's House on mon 23 jan 06
Spoken like a true American!
-Steven
Toronto, Canada
earlk wrote:
>On Mon, 2006-01-23 at 10:55 -0800, Steve Slatin wrote:
>
>
>>And also --
>>
>> Q - Is it necessary to learn Canadian to communicate while in Canada?
>> A - No, many Canadians are bilingual and also speak Quebecois.
>> Quebecois is exactly like French except when it's different, which is
>> most of the time.
>>
>> Q - Where can I study Quebecois?
>> A - It is taught only in Quebec.
>>
>>
>>
>
>
>Follow-up question:
>
> Q - Is Quebec part of Canada?
> A - Well, we don't really know for sure. Sometimes it is and
>sometimes not.
>
>
>earlk
>bothell, wa, usa
>
>______________________________________________________________________________
>Send postings to clayart@lsv.ceramics.org
>
>You may look at the archives for the list or change your subscription
>settings from http://www.ceramics.org/clayart/
>
>Moderator of the list is Mel Jacobson who may be reached at melpots@pclink.com.
>
>
>
>
Graeme Anderson on mon 23 jan 06
Edouard.
They are the same questions that were asked about Australia for the 2000
Olympics, except for a couple of name changes for places and animals. I
wonder how the questions would be answered in Chinese for the 2008 Games.
Cheers. Graeme.
Steve Slatin on mon 23 jan 06
And also --
Q - Is it necessary to learn Canadian to communicate while in Canada?
A - No, many Canadians are bilingual and also speak Quebecois.
Quebecois is exactly like French except when it's different, which is
most of the time.
Q - Where can I study Quebecois?
A - It is taught only in Quebec.
- Steve S.
Now that Vancouver is to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some
questions people the world over are asking! Believe it or not these
questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website.
Obviously the answers are jokes, and the questions are hilarious; but
sadly the questions were really asked. (really sad. )
Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow?UK)
A:We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch
them die.
Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A:Depends on how much you've been drinking.
Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad
tracks? (Sweden)
A:Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A:So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q:It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to
contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A:Let's not touch this one.
Q:Are there any ATM's(cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A:What did your last slave die of?
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A:A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.
Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo
racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q:Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A:Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and
we ll send the rest of the directions.
Q:Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A:Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which
is...oh
forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in
Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q:Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A:No, WE don't stink.
Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you
sell it in Canada?(USA)
A:Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q:Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female
population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A:Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q:Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A:Only at Thanksgiving.
Q:Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round?
(Germany)
A:No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegans. Milk is illegal.
Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its
name.
It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A:It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains
of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
Q:Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A:Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
Send this on to other true Canadians
Steve Slatin --
Le réalité et toi, vous ne vous entendez pas, n'est-ce pas?
---------------------------------
Yahoo! Photos – Showcase holiday pictures in hardcover
Photo Books. You design it and we’ll bind it!
earlk on mon 23 jan 06
On Mon, 2006-01-23 at 10:55 -0800, Steve Slatin wrote:
> And also --
>
> Q - Is it necessary to learn Canadian to communicate while in Canada?
> A - No, many Canadians are bilingual and also speak Quebecois.
> Quebecois is exactly like French except when it's different, which is
> most of the time.
>
> Q - Where can I study Quebecois?
> A - It is taught only in Quebec.
>
Follow-up question:
Q - Is Quebec part of Canada?
A - Well, we don't really know for sure. Sometimes it is and
sometimes not.
earlk
bothell, wa, usa
Edouard Bastarache Inc. on mon 23 jan 06
Hehehehehehehehe
----- Original Message -----
From: "earlk"
To:
Sent: Monday, January 23, 2006 4:14 PM
Subject: Re: Questions about Canada
> On Mon, 2006-01-23 at 10:55 -0800, Steve Slatin wrote:
>> And also --
>>
>> Q - Is it necessary to learn Canadian to communicate while in Canada?
>> A - No, many Canadians are bilingual and also speak Quebecois.
>> Quebecois is exactly like French except when it's different, which is
>> most of the time.
>>
>> Q - Where can I study Quebecois?
>> A - It is taught only in Quebec.
>>
>
>
> Follow-up question:
>
> Q - Is Quebec part of Canada?
> A - Well, we don't really know for sure. Sometimes it is and
> sometimes not.
>
>
> earlk
> bothell, wa, usa
>
> ______________________________________________________________________________
> Send postings to clayart@lsv.ceramics.org
>
> You may look at the archives for the list or change your subscription
> settings from http://www.ceramics.org/clayart/
>
> Moderator of the list is Mel Jacobson who may be reached at
> melpots@pclink.com.
>
>
Ivor and Olive Lewis on tue 24 jan 06
Let's keep it topical...
Q. Is Canada a Democracy.
A.Yes, one of the best. To ensure that it remains so less that fifty =
percent of those eligible to vote will go to the polls for any election.
Best regards to Canadian friends past and present, including Mouse =
Fabbro from Winnepeg and Moose from Guelph.
Ivor
Farfl's House on tue 24 jan 06
Spoken like a true penal colony inhabitant!
Ivor and Olive Lewis wrote:
>Let's keep it topical...
>
>Q. Is Canada a Democracy.
>
>A.Yes, one of the best. To ensure that it remains so less that fifty percent of those eligible to vote will go to the polls for any election.
>
>Best regards to Canadian friends past and present, including Mouse Fabbro from Winnepeg and Moose from Guelph.
>
>Ivor
>
>______________________________________________________________________________
>Send postings to clayart@lsv.ceramics.org
>
>You may look at the archives for the list or change your subscription
>settings from http://www.ceramics.org/clayart/
>
>Moderator of the list is Mel Jacobson who may be reached at melpots@pclink.com.
>
>
>
>
Des & Jan Howard on fri 27 jan 06
Steven
Ivor is a recent blow-in, came to Oz as a free settler.
The rest of us lace hankie thieving, bread stealing, political agitating,
not good enough to use as empire building cannon fodder,
garbage of the Mother country, have been here a bit longer. :-)
Des
Farfl's House wrote:
> Spoken like a true penal colony inhabitant!
>
> Ivor and Olive Lewis wrote:
>
>> Let's keep it topical...
>>
>> Q. Is Canada a Democracy.
>>
>> A.Yes, one of the best. To ensure that it remains so less that fifty
>> percent of those eligible to vote will go to the polls for any election.
>>
--
Des & Jan Howard
Lue Pottery
LUE NSW 2850
Australia
Ph/Fax 02 6373 6419
http://www.luepottery.hwy.com.au
Ivor and Olive Lewis on sat 28 jan 06
True Des, true !=20
Ivor is a recent blow-in, came to Oz as a free settler.
The rest of us lace hankie thieving, bread stealing, political =
agitating,
not good enough to use as empire building cannon fodder,
garbage of the Mother country, have been here a bit longer. :-)
Des
And the finest investment I ever made. You early "drop in's" made a fine =
job of things "Down Under" . A good place to be if you want to "go to =
Pot"
Best regards,
Ivor
| |
|
