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humor/ rant: schlepping to nceca (for joyce)

updated wed 25 jan 06


W J Seidl on tue 24 jan 06

I have reached a point in my life where I am no longer willing to be put =
by others laziness. Call it stubbornness, call it what you will. I =
refuse to be inconvenienced because others can't or won't do their jobs, =
exercise common courtesy.
For example; walking down a busy crowded sidewalk, I will no longer get =
of the way for a gaggle of 20-somethings who decide (in typical herd
mentality so common to the young these days) to group together as they =
and force everyone else to the side. I just stop where I am, and force =
to move around ME. Of course I still move for those older than I am, =
the physically handicapped etc. but I have as much right to the =
sidewalk as
everyone else. I've paid those dues.

To that end, a few years back I decided to apply this to the airlines as

If my flight is delayed, which means that on reaching a connecting =
I must run at top speed to the next gate to make a connection, I do not. =
refuse. I go to the nearest counter, explain that I am going to miss my
connection because their airline delayed the flight, and tell them that =
I am
"not physically capable" of running to make it (no, it's not a lie). =
call a cart, and see to it that I make that flight, sometimes calling =
to hold the plane. After all, it's their fault, not mine. Why should I =
inconvenienced because THEY can't keep to a schedule?

With connecting flights, there is also now a commonly expected "chance" =
your luggage is no longer going to make the connection, even if by some
miracle you DO. BAH!=20
I am not going to schlep luggage like a demented sherpa on speed through =
unfamiliar airport, scurrying from one gate to another like a cow led to
slaughter (and you KNOW we're all treated like cattle, don't you?) =
I have adopted the practice of sending my luggage on ahead, via FEDEX. =
it as you normally would, put the suitcase in a box, and send it a day =
of time, so that it is waiting for you on your arrival. (Just call the =
and let them know it is coming, and ask that it be held for you.) I did =
for Baltimore, I'm doing it for Portland, I've done it dozens of times =
over the planet. It has always arrived on time, and in better shape =
than if
the airline gorillas were to handle it. I send it home the same way. =
it's not as cheap as letting the airlines do it, but it IS more secure, =
I have never had one "lost", leaving me without so much as a toothbrush =
in a
city on the other side of the continent.
Now, with that inconvenience out of my way, I'm free to meander through =
airport with only my fanny pack, my book and tickets.

My next trick is going to be to find a way to eliminate (circumvent) the
demeaning practice of having us remove our shoes for "security". I'm
thinking that those diving slip-ons that are worn under water would =
All silicone, no metal to trigger the detectors, and you won't have to
expose your clean socks to those FILTHY germ-ridden airport carpets, =
with "god-only-knows what was pressed into it" from thousands of =
fungi-ridden hooves trotting over them. What goes through my mind =
the shoe removal and replacement was that it only took ONE deranged =
trying to do something STUPID and light his shoe in an airplane to
inconvenience hundreds of thousands of the rest of us.

If I throw a cheap pair of white socks on OVER them, the idiots in TSA =
even look twice. Perhaps wear SOCKS ONLY, and just throw them away

But don't get me started should see how they look at boas!

Wayne Seidl

Snip main message

in the Mojave preparing for NCECA....... I have plane reservations and
think that is the best way to go in March crossing the mountains..... =
I'd sure like to drive and have room for all the "stuff" I've =
to take along. Wonder if mailing a box to myself at the Red Lion would